Responding to Noel Perrin’s “A Part Time Marriage”

First published September 9, 1984 in the New York Times magazine, Noel Perrin’s “A Part Time Marriage,” identifies the problems with modern marriages, as well as discusses the post-divorce behaviors of many middle class couples. He proposes his own resolution to these problems. Perrin feels that levels of intimacy can help in establishing the success of a relationship or marriage. I agree with him that elevated levels of intimacy and closeness will make for a longer and better relationship, even though we do have a rather high divorce rate.
Perrin’s first point is that when many marriages end, post-divorce behaviors begin. He says that many middle class couples that have children who separate will slowly work into a part-time marriage. It starts normally when the woman leaves her husband to find herself. She and the ex will work into a kind of routine where he will come over to help out with the outside chores and handy work, she will maybe do his laundry, and he will al...