Looking Beyond the Sexes

Looking Beyond the Sexes
Have you ever felt hostility in a relationship and could not figure out where it came from? It may be that the hostility stemmed from resentment that you did not even know existed. Often we resent someone without even recognizing it because we admire something about him or her that we are not capable of achieving for ourselves. One may not agree with Karen Horney’s statement that “it is contrary to human nature to sustain appreciation without resentment toward capabilities that one does not possess,”(360) but one must recognize that this envy is complicated by gender so that we do not allow resentment to hinder a relationship with someone of the opposite sex without being aware of the role gender plays. In Karen Horney’s essay “The Distrust Between the Sexes,” she explains the anxiety between people of the opposite sex. Childhood conflicts and reflections, envy for the opposite sex, and the gender distinction between the sexes, are just a f...