Kissing, Jurors

I was cooped up in a hot courtroom all day today, doing my civic duty as an eligible juror. We had to sit through a long and boring selection process as the lawyers decided which of the 70 people would be the 12 to sit at the trial. I noticed that they were really pretty tough on jurors in the engineering field. Here is an unexaggerated* account of what happened when they found an engineer:

Lawyer: So, Mr. Williams, I understand that you're an engineer?

Mr. Williams: Yes, that's corre--

*Lawyer plunges a sharpened No. 2 pencil deep into Mr. Williams' left eyeball*

Lawyer: Oh! I guess the Scientific Method didn't see that one coming, huh shithead?!

*grabs a fistful of hair and slams Mr. Williams' head down on the desk for emphasis with every other word*

Lawyer: Around HERE, we don't GIVE a FUCK about your SKILLS of REASONING! You just USE the FACTS that I GIVE to you!

*knee to the stomach*

Lawyer: I don't even have to prove that this guy really did it. I'...